I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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