I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Randomize
