somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
