Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Randomize
