DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize