Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
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