I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
Randomize