He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
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