I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
