I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Randomize
