therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
