I heard we made out
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
