Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
