this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Randomize
