I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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