It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
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