I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Randomize
