Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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