then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
These Dirty People Haven’t Told Their SO About Their Kinky Fetish
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
This is Why People Stop Sex Halfway Through
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?