dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
Randomize
