Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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