the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
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