True or false: I did not bring home a 28 year old last night.
True? Did she teach you things?
She taught me the meaning of awkward goodbyes at 530 am.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
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He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
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Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
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