Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
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