I wanna bring you to show and tell
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
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