you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
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