I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
Can you bring me the toilet please
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
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