I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
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