I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
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