Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
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But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
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