office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
Randomize