Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize