i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
Randomize
