If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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