If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
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