dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
