Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
I am one with the molecules
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
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