ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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