I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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