people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
