take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
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