I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize