Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
Randomize
