I'm really into asian looking animals
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
