idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Randomize