we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
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