Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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