...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
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