Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize
