My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
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