if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
